Optimise for curiousity, not productivity

The past few years (2019-2022) I've avoided setting goals - carrying, giving birth to and then caring for two children really doesn't leave a whole lot of energy for chasing big dreams, or at least not for me. I've been in survival mode, and very gentle with myself in terms of productivity. I gave myself permission to not worry about chipping away at big goals, but to instead follow my curiousity as my energy allows, without judgement of where I get to and whether I've reached any measure of success or value.

But you know what? In addition to being a whole lot more chill, I've actually done a lot of good stuff, and had fun doing it. Not as much as pre-kids me with consistent sleep and a free schedule perhaps, but I don't think that would have been the case even if I'd hustled through the sleep deprivation. I've painted (digitally and traditionally), made a new website, learned about investing in shares, reduced my environmental footprint, found a consistent gym routine, got myself a new job, read a bunch of books, written a bunch of notes - and these things energised and enlarged me.

This has led me to believe that for me at least, setting big goals and optimising for productivity isn't the way to living a satisfying life. Maybe optimising for curiousity, especially in my very limited free time, is the approach that will give me the most energy and take me to the most interesting places.

I haven't figured out how to evolve this to be a little more intentional for 2023 now that I'm getting a full night of sleep regularly again (for now at least). I'll revisit this note as I figure things out.